Stuck

Hmm I feel so stuck... in a situation which I don't feel like I have the right to complain

I'm very very stressed out with exams that are coming up... Have I done enough?? I don't think so... I lay down at night feeling alone that if i do not do well I WILL be alone to face that fact.... The few that often ask me how am I??? I don't know how to tell you what I feel.... Its just unfair if I complain about everything I'm going through cause WHO deserves to listen to crap just cause I fail to hold up my own head??

If there is cracks.... conceal them quickly with cement.... who wants to see cracks up a supposedly good wall....

One day I was crying driving home.... being FED UP with my life..... being stuck.... I get no rest.... A lifestyle that is on edge..... and to imagine... the more rest I do get ... the more things I have to do when I get up.... I was just thinking hey what if I gave up on everything around me and wait for people to come to me..... Heh..... I realise its NOT MY CHOICE..... I HAVE NO CHOICE.... the live which I live isn't mine..... I made my self a promise a long long time ago.... that I will NEVER cry unless I really cannot bare the pain in my heart.....

I do to others what I hope others can do for me.... but most if not ALL fail.... I've tried to tell but words wont come..... I know there are some... Especially one whom can read my expressions well .... but sad to say I don't know how to express whats in my heart and on my mind... my concerns and pains all don't come out the way I'd hope you can understand..

I have wonderful friends.... some who can be absolutely lovable and some that can FAIL SO DAmm badly that they can't even think of you in the slightest of issues.... hmm hey wait after all who cares eh..... you're not in my shoes.... you don't give half as much as you supposedly can after all.....